Today, I am at work and yes I know that I should be actually doing my job, but right now…
I was tagged in a post on Facebook and it said, “Love this. Just show up. Be present. Forget what others want you to do. Just be you”
And then I read the tag line by the page itself….
“Allow yourself to be a beginner. No one starts off being excellent.”
Have I read the article yet? … No.
But did I have a slight internal struggle? … Yes.
You are probably asking “why?!”. The answer to that is actually quite simple. People have been saying it to me for years!
“Fox, you are too hard on yourself”
And its true, I don’t allow myself to be crap at something, I don’t allow it so much in fact, that if I am not good at something straight off the bat, I tend to get discouraged and not continue.
I guess that this post, nay this entire blog! Is an open letter to myself, to track my progress and my changes in thoughts and learnings. This is for me to be OK with me.
So here it goes; (and anyone can take this letter and apply it to them in some way)
I know that you have had many goals in life, that you wanted to achieve but couldn’t, for some reason or another and not all of them was because you gave up.
You tried so hard to apply, re-apply, re-apply re-apply… Time and time again, year after year for your job in Forensics. It never happened. You know now that things happen for a reason and its for the best even though there is still 5% of you that wishes that you could still do it. Don’t worry, that will soon go down to 0% and you will be happier than ever in the job you are meant to be doing. Not because of the job itself, but because what you will achieve. Good on You!
Now, talking of this job where you will achieve many great things; they wont happen straight away, you wont be good at it straight away. Like everything new, you will have to learn, you will have to fail and you will have to try again. And again and again and again… Till you finally get it… And you will. I know that you will.
It is more than OK, to be a beginner and start all over again.
I will repeat that. It is more than OK to start all over again.
It is OK to start all over again.
It is a process, a journey and its yours. So STOP comparing yourself to others. STOP comparing yourself to yourself in a different role.
Just be you and just show up. That is all you need to do. Because that is your first step, to your new beginning.
Fox, remember, I love you and appreciate you and there are many other people out there who do as well.
Thanks Fox for listening and being patient with me.
Sign off: Fox